Well I hope you all had a great Memorial Day Weekend.  I heard a question posed on the radio shortly after, "What is the one thing that ruined the holiday for people?"  One might guess - The Rainy Weather, but you would be wrong.  It was smart phones.  It's true if you think about it.  You are supposed to be on a holiday but can still receive numerous work emails that add to the to-dos or elevate your mood to anxiety.  I tend to have the opposite problem though.  I never have my phone around, and it drives my husband crazy when he tries to get a hold of me.  Then when I find my phone eventually I have tons of work to catch up with.  Well, I guess with everything comes balance.

All Choked Up

Dear Tina,

I’ve always been extremely outgoing. Some might even say loud and too wild. While this is definitely a side of me, I also go through these periods of introversion and social anxiety. My throat closes up, my neck gets stiff and I stumble around my words. For fear of embarrassment, I tend to hibernate when I feel this coming on now. I stay home and wallow in my sadness, which only extends the issue I’m sure. What is going on? Why do I go from one extreme to another?

—All Choked Up

Dear All Choked Up,

Well, your 5th chakra (the area that regulates your throat, neck, expression, communication, truth and voice in the world) is definitely being affected. First off, the electromagnetic expression and release of this chakra is likely uneven, causing the shape of the energy to be wobbly. This wobbly center then spins and creates ups and downs for you. Picture a smooth ball rolling down a hill. Now picture an oval, square or uneven shape rolling down a hill. Notice the difference. At some moments it may roll too fast. At other moments it may stop completely. This is what your 5th chakra is likely doing.

There are many reasons this happens sometimes. I would invite you to think about when you first started noticing these swings. Likely something occurred just before then that shifted the energy of this chakra. This is the key to healing this area, as you are still being affected by whatever happened.

Now have you felt this your whole life? Do you remember if you also experienced this as a child, or has it just been since adulthood? If you feel like you have always dealt with this, then this imbalance could be an ancestral or a past-life issue. Both of those would involve some deeper work ideally with an intuitive or regressionist to discover and release the initial energy pattern.

In the meantime, on your own you can imagine the area of your 5th chakra (neck and throat) as evening out. If you’re visual, you can picture a record spinning or a lump of clay on a potter’s wheel being smoothed out. If you’re more kinesthetic, you can feel the lump of clay getting smoothed out. Play with this and see what you discover!

—Tina Bensman

Hunch in the Back, Short in the Breath

Dear Tina,

Since I was a teenager I have dealt with a bad upper back. Now in my 50s, I not only have pain, but also notice that my posture is hunched forward making it difficult to straighten out. I am currently working on exercises to stretch this area, but it feels like something is going on more than physically. When I stretch my back, I also feel anxiety rising in my heart. It begins to beat faster and I’m short of breath. This makes me not want to do the exercises, which then puts me on a cycle of not healing the issue. What’s going on here?

—Anxious Hunchback

Dear Anxious Hunchback,

Well, it appears that around the time the issue began, your heart (4th) chakra was hit with some sort of trauma. Now, a trauma doesn’t have to be dramatic and serious. Trauma just refers to an energy that someone or something threw at you. I would guess that there was a romantic relationship issue just before you began feeling the upper back problem develop, possibly a break-up or unrequited love. Whatever the situation, it seems like it caused you to want to protect your heart expression.

The front of our chakras express who we are and how we are currently feeling. By hunching your upper back, you are essentially creating a shell of protection around the front of your chest, thus closing off your expression. This is so very common when we are relationally affected because of fear of rejection, fear of vulnerability, etc.

This arched back (closing off of the front) has also created a large opening of the back of your 4th chakra, allowing too much energy to enter unprotected. The backs of chakras allow new, replenished, evolved energy to come in, but if it is un-boundaried, you could also be bringing in energy that isn’t you. To sum it all up, your 4th chakra is likely bringing in too much energy and is unable to process or express it.

To remedy the situation, you definitely want to heal this from all angles. When you are doing your physical exercises for your upper back, work simultaneously with releasing from the front of your chest. You can see, hear or feel energy releasing out your heart space. Take your time and pay attention to what you notice. What does it feel like as it releases? Is it hard, fluid, cold or sticky? Have fun exploring. Although this issue has caused you hardship, the healing process doesn’t have to. Play and discover what you can do for yourself now and in the future.

—Tina Bensman

Got the ideas but Can't Create

Dear Tina,

Recently, I have had so many ideas. I am bombarded with projects I want to do. I make sketches and lists, and the ideas just keep coming. The problem is, I don’t actually do anything about them. It’s not like I don’t have the ambition, but I just don’t get off the couch and take the steps to accomplish anything. What is wrong with me?

—Creative Procrastinator

Dear Creative Procrastinator,

Ah, nothing is wrong with you. Your true energy is aware there is a problem and recognizes an imbalance. That’s huge! It sounds to me like your 2nd chakra, which regulates creativity and ideas amongst many other areas, is working hard, evolving and going strong. The issue lies with the 2nd chakra’s connection to the 3rd chakra. The 3rd chakra regulates motivation, goals, to-do lists, success, confidence, personal power, etc. So the creative energy you are developing isn’t reaching the area of your energy system that can do anything about it.

You said this started recently. So, was there a time that you were able to accomplish tasks with more ease? If so, when was that? What happened between then and now? Make a list of anything that occurred in your life physically, emotionally, mentally, relationally and/or spiritually. For example, did you get a promotion at work, or did you get laid off? Make a list of anything that happened, whether you think it’s related or not. Once you discover the reason your 3rd chakra shut down, you can begin to restructure your beliefs about this area.

If you have always struggled with this issue, even as a child, I would consider the possibility that you came into this lifetime with a blockage in your 3rd chakra already. If you believe in past lives, I would examine this in a past-life regression session.

You know that you have these ideas to fulfill them, and that is why you recognize the issue and are discouraged. Examining these potential blocks will not only help with this area of your life but will also open up much more. Good luck to you!

- See more at: http://naturespathways.com/index.php?option=com_k2&view=item&id=2285:a-monthly-advice-column-for-your-energy-system-%E2%80%93-march-2013&Itemid=268#sthash.wPs4kTNf.dpuf

Don't Like Being Alone

Dear Tina,

I have always valued relationships; however, I seem to need people around me at all times. It’s difficult for me to be alone, and I recognize this as a potential issue. Is there something wrong with my energy? Why can’t I just be alone with thoughts?

—Alone-a-phobic

Dear Alone-a-phobic,

Well first off, there is nothing wrong with your energy; it is just not working for you the way you want it to. This issue can be addressed in many different ways.

I would start by evaluating your 4th chakra. Even without knowing much about the chakra system, you can start to check on this area yourself with a few tips. The 4th chakra is located in and around your heart and upper back. This space regulates relationships, compassion, giving and receiving, connections, forgiveness and other heart-centered areas of life. Start on the physical side of your well-being. Do you have tension in your upper back or heaviness on your heart? Do you feel too open or vulnerable? If you notice anything physically in this area, then there is an imbalance here.

Next, move to the mental and emotional sides. You’ve already recognized that it is difficult to be alone and that you need people around you. Look deeper and ask yourself why. What happens when you are alone? Are your thoughts overwhelming and do you have trouble quieting your mind? Do you feel like your emotions are out of your control? If so, then there may also be imbalances in your 2nd and 3rd chakras.

To reassure you, imbalances are not only common but also normal. In almost all cases, imbalances exist so that we can evaluate our lives and make changes if necessary. The fact that you recognize that your need for relationships is not working for you shows that you are ready for a change. It is your choice to shift your focus, examine the beliefs you hold about yourself and others, and decide whether to make a change or stay where you are. There is not a right or wrong choice — just a productive or unproductive one for your energy.

Dear Tina,

Every year I make a New Year’s resolution to do something spectacular and a few weeks later it fades. I feel like a failure, give up and don’t address what I wanted to change until the next new year. This year, I am feeling worse than ever. I am not as physically healthy as I’d like to be, but my relationships are also suffering. I’m just not feeling like I know who I am anymore. I think (hope) my life will come together when I connect with myself again. What can I do to maintain my resolution this year of connecting with myself, losing weight and repairing struggling relationships?

—Losing my Resolutions

Dear Losing my Resolutions,

Well — you are not alone. It is rare to hear of someone maintaining their original New Year’s resolutions. In my experience this is nearly always due to the inner personalities we all hear chattering away in our heads. If you think this sounds crazy, then keep reading!

We all have parts of ourselves that seem to freeze in time when we develop beliefs about what life is all about. For example, a part of us might feel that all relationships cause pain, while another part of us yearns for connection and knows that relationships also bring joy. In many ways, both of these parts are correct, but when we get stuck in one belief and that part speaks louder than our other selves it can be really challenging to stick with a goal of any kind.

This is not a quick remedy, but the most effective way of solving these inner debates is to listen to the voices within. Listen to the battles. You may be surprised at what you discover about your inner self related to beliefs on physical health, weight, relationships, healing, and feeling replenished and joyful. There is a reason that a part of you may not want to achieve these seemingly healthy things. Intellectually, you may not understand why you would not choose health, but there may be a deeper reason or benefit that when unlocked can be unbelievably eye opening and life changing.

Hey everyone!

What an interesting month it has been. The Chakra House has gone through numerous changes with our recent relocation, so I thought I’d take a break from our monthly advice column and talk about how to deal with change energetically.

You know how they say, the two things you can’t avoid are death and taxes? Well, I’d like to add “change” in there as well. I guess technically it is possible to avoid change, but without change there is no evolution. No growth. No possibility. Yes, it can be scary sometimes, but it is crucial to our development as human beings and our energy systems.

Sometimes we are searching for a change and feel blocked and unable to shift into the new. This happens when our spirits are ready to go, but our physical self may not be on board. Emotions, beliefs and sometimes actual physical ailments may prevent us from noticing or accessing the energetic opportunities that surround us.

To make sure that you are achieving your potential for a flowing, changing and shifting energy system, here are some steps you can take:

1. Develop a regular “check-in” meditation or moment in your day. We often forget to just talk to ourselves — or better yet — listen to ourselves. You are incredibly intuitive whether you know it or not. The moment you stop listening to your own needs and wants, you disconnect yourself from your own natural ability to receive answers for yourself. Even if it is only for one minute, find time each day to check in with yourself. “How am I doing?”
2. Remember that it is okay to let go. I don’t think I could ever talk about grounding enough. Without letting energy go, there is no room to fill up with the fabulous energies around us. Release and let go. Grounding or letting go doesn’t mean that you forget experiences or difficult situations. When you ground, you are letting go of the emotional charge and mental stress those situations create. Remember the moments, let go of the rest.
3. Replenish your energy now that there is room. Imagine yourself connected to, well, you. The true you. The you without all the stress, drama and issues that the physical you faces. The you that is pure and ready for anything that comes your way. This is the real you. What do you really look like, sound like, feel like? Who are you really? Once you connect to this part of yourself, you will feel that change is a natural process that isn’t to be feared or searched for. You will flow into the new opportunities with ease.

Have fun experimenting, and come visit The Chakra House at our new location to see how we are dealing with our change by checking in, grounding and replenishing.

Black Sheep

Dear Tina,

With the holidays rapidly approaching, I am already feeling panicked about family get-togethers.  I don’t get along with my family and feel like they don’t understand me.  I need help knowing how to handle being with people that bring out the bad side of me.

—Black Sheep

Dear Black Sheep,

Family is interesting whether biological, in-laws or caretakers in general.  There are three main areas that you can work on to make the holidays at least bearable if not pleasant.  The first and main area to work with is your boundaries.

A Rainy Reminder

Sometimes we all need a reminder of how to stay in balance, including myself.  For this month’s column I thought an experience I had would resonate with many of you regarding this.

I was driving back home from a relaxing holiday weekend when it started to downpour.  Lighting was striking left and right and the rain on the windshield left no room to see the speeding cars around me.  This has always been a source of panic for me in the past - control.  Not having control of the surroundings and knowing that at any moment a car could lose control.

Healer for Others

Dear Tina,

I am exhausted. I feel like I am being used for my good nature. I feel like my only place is to help other people even when I don’t get anything in return. I can’t say no. I want to say no, but I feel like I’m doing something wrong. How can I get back to me? I don’t even know what that is anymore.

—Healer for Others

Dear Healer for Others,

You nailed the issue in the title you chose. You are a healer — a natural, innate healer. Unfortunately this miraculous gift seems like it has taken over your body, your mind and your true purpose.