Weeping Widow

Dear Tina,

I lost my precious cat to cancer over a year ago, and I still can’t move on.  I cry almost every night thinking of her.  I am nauseous and sometimes feel pain in my stomach – ironically where her cancer originated.  We were so close, but I feel like I should be at a place where it doesn’t affect me this much by now.  Why can’t I let her go?

— Weeping Widow

Dear Weeping Widow,

First of all, I am so sorry for your loss.  I’m very attached to my cats as well, so I can only imagine your grief.  There are a few reasons that you may not be able to move on, however the most likely reason is that you two are most likely connected by an energy cord.

An energy cord is just as it sounds – a cord that is connected to two or more energy bodies (in your case you and your cat) that provides a direct passage for energy to exchange.  In other words, you are giving a part of yourself to your cat, and your cat is giving a part of herself to you.  These connections are formed for many reasons and can sometimes really deepen the bond between energy bodies, but truthfully they are rarely helpful and sometimes very destructive in the long run.

When you give a part of yourself away and fill up the empty space with someone else’s energy, you lose your natural vibration and in turn receive a vibration that isn’t natural for your system.  You may also exchange energy that creates disease, disorders, distress, etc.  Eventually it is very easy to feel less and less like yourself.

It sounds like you and your cat are still connected via an energy cord even though she has passed on and therefore still exchanging energy.  It feels like you can’t let her go because you are truly “hanging on by a string.”  For you to be able to move on, you must disconnect this cord.  While that sounds a little scary or harsh, this removal does not mean that you will not have a connection with your deceased pet.  It just means that you will not be exchanging energy and will have to find another way to make contact.

A healthier way to be connected to any other energy body is to express your energy, meet in the middle, mingle a bit and then come back to yourself having learned, evolved and grown from the exchange.  In your case, you can set aside a regular time to devote to making contact.  You can talk about your day, share thoughts of the future, or think of memories of you and your cat.  Allow yourself the full range of emotions that go along with these thoughts.  Then using your intuition, see, listen or feel your cats’ feelings and thoughts too.  It’s an energetic and intuitive conversation.  When you are finished, you say goodbye just like you would with a friend when you’re finished with a friendly conversation.  Think of it as a regular phone call to check in.

If you need help with cutting the cord and having an intuitive conversation with your cat or any other animal or person, I can teach you those skills in one-on-one sessions or in a classroom setting through The Chakra House Institute of Intuitive Arts & Sciences.  You can learn about these services and many more on our website – www.thechakrahouse.com.

I wish you luck and I hope you have a lot of fun connecting in this new, healthy way.

-Tina Bensman