Healer for Others

Dear Tina,

I am exhausted. I feel like I am being used for my good nature. I feel like my only place is to help other people even when I don’t get anything in return. I can’t say no. I want to say no, but I feel like I’m doing something wrong. How can I get back to me? I don’t even know what that is anymore.

—Healer for Others

Dear Healer for Others,

You nailed the issue in the title you chose. You are a healer — a natural, innate healer. Unfortunately this miraculous gift seems like it has taken over your body, your mind and your true purpose.

It appears that you are naturally taking on other peoples’ issues (productive and unproductive issues) and holding that energy in your body. This allows the other person to feel an immediate release — something they probably were not able to accomplish on their own. It also creates a dependence on you. Most likely, they have no idea what is happening when they are in your presence; only that they feel better after seeing you. Meanwhile, you are left with energy that does not fit in your system, with your body or with your purpose. This is exhausting to say the least.

You also mentioned that you feel like you’re doing something wrong if you say no. This is also a common symptom of an unbalanced and unboundaried healing gift. When you say no, you likely can feel the response of the other person. They may feel rejected or abandoned. You can feel that and it can create guilt. The truth is that it is not your responsibility to fix other people. You can do it naturally, but in order for it to be effective you must take care of yourself first. You are no good to others if your system is a mess!

There are 5 steps to a healthy healing experience for a healer. They are:

• Grounding – setting a point of stability for yourself as well as a place to release all that you may absorb.
• Clearing – cleaning out the energy around and inside of you.
• Protecting – establishing boundaries so that you will be aware if energy that is not yours enters your system.
• Opening – deciding what part of your system is open in order to connect fully and accurately, and then you can be open to the other person.
• Closing – making sure you close and release the connection when the healing is complete so that you are not continuing to heal someone after they leave.

There is much information about these topics in a variety of mediums (books, guided meditation CDs, online, etc.). At The Chakra House we teach a class called “Self-Healing and Intuitive Meditation” that goes over all these topics and allows you to practice your own unique way of accessing your abilities even if you’re not aware you have them. This class is also a prerequisite to our Energy Work Certification Program — a one-year program that teaches you everything you need to know about the science and art of energy work and intuition. Check out our Web site for more details on the courses. Most importantly, take care of yourself first and then you can have fun with your gift!